For anyone who has ever lived through a single trauma, there is a distinct before and after.
I am afraid to go to work. I missed three days last week; I started on another anxiety medication, blood pressure medication, and migraine medication. All to try to get the panic attack to stop. Thankfully, it’s all temporary, but I can barely breathe every time I walk into the school building.
A student attempted to attack me, and when he couldn’t, he caused several thousand dollars in damage.
My superior says he’s coming back. Next week. He’s in my class, and he has a legal right to an education. This was not a single event for this kid. He has done this over and over, but this was the first time I was the target. What about the safety of the other 25 kids in my class? The legal right to an education is taken on an individual basis. Somehow, in our safety-driven, fearful world, that right trumps the responsibility to keep the kids safe. The right to an education and the right to be safe at school are incompatible right now.
God is my strength. I know He’ll get me through. I’ve applied to go to a different school next year. I hate starting over, but this is more than I can handle, and I feel like God is telling me it’s okay to go.
God is my strength. We have three months left of school, and I know He’ll take care of me. He does that. I trust He’ll keep my students safe, not just physical but mentally. Trauma does weird things to a young mind, but God knows the big picture.
P.S. I already know “all the things” related to the placement of this student, and I’m on top of it. I’m not asking for advice on how to handle things; just asking for prayer as I process through what happened.